5 annoying things Chinese women do

While Chinese women have some very good qualities, they have some strange habits which annoy the shit out of me.

Warning: Rant expected

Sending voice messages on Wechat

As mentioned here, every Chinese person uses Wechat. When using Wechat, Chinese people have this really irritating habit of sending voice messages instead of making phone calls/ texting. You’ll see people walking around with their mouths glued to the microphones of their phones.

This is a fucking walking hazard. I’ve had people bump into me because they were busy listening to the voice message xiaoming sent them and speaking into the fucking mic of their phones.

Do these people realize how much time is being wasted sending voice messages back and forth? We’re in the 21st century for christ’s sake, my dad used to send cassettes fro Canada back to Asia with his voice recordings in the 70s when phone calls used to cost a lot of money. Phone calls cost virtually nothing today and yet people favour using an antiquated and outdated form of communication.

Excessively patriotic

When talking to any mainland Chinese person, you’ll often hear words like 国内 (Guo Nei–Within the nation) and 国语 (Guo Yu–National language, I.e. Mandarin) thrown around. This gives you an idea of how patriotic Chinese people are.

Most Chinese people think that China is the best country on earth. Yes, it is the land of opportunity, it is becoming increasingly technologically advanced, most people are extremely productive because (if you don’t do your job properly, someone else will replace you), food is amazing, etc etc etc.

The thing that pisses me off is how one sided their patriotism is. Firstly, let me say that there is no perfect place on earth. Most Chinese people have overlooked the fact that China has extremely bad pollution, is overpopulated and a huge disparity between rich and poor. Point out these things about China, worse, say something bad about chairman Mao, and you’ll see that pussy dry up so quick.

Fear of the sun

Chinese women are obsessed with pale skin and have an almost manic fear of the sun. Ever see a Chinese girl walking with an umbrella when theres no rain?  I’ve seen a Chines girl open her umbrella on the bus to cover her face.

Vitamin D is good for you, ladies.

Herding

Pre-selection is king in Chinese society. It’s no coincidence that the 朋友圈 is extremely important to every Chinese person (especially women). Everyone is competing to see who has a better life; what was your latest purchase? Where did you go on vacation? What car are you driving? Which restaurant did you go to?

You see this all the time, a girl sees her friend go to Paris on vacation, they take some pseudo-wannabe-modelesque photos by the Eiffle tower and she wants to go. Her friend has a new handbag, she wants one. You get the picture.

While I agree that all women behave like a bunch of herded sheep, Chinese women take this to a whole new level.

Period pains

A lot of Chinese girls I’ve known have Chernobyl level period pains. It’s like the word has imploded whenever it’s that time of the month again. You’ll see a girl incapacitated and literally bed-ridden during her period.

Worse, Chinese women don’t waste their hair for several days when the niagra falls is gushing blood out. Why? There is this belief that washing the hair will stop blood from flowing because (apparently) the ancient Chinese used to do this to pregnant women who were bleeding heavily.

Your girl won’t be looking too pretty at her time of the month. Imagine if she didn’t wash her hair for 2 days, her period comes and she holds off washing it for another 5 days. Thats a week she hasn’t washed her hair. Need to fry some noodles?

One other thing that pisses me off about Chinese women on their periods is that they can’t eat a myriad of things. Seafood, spicy food, certain fruits like papaya or coconut. There are apps which tell you what to eat and what not to eat on your period. Or as the Chinese say (当大姨妈来了, when the aunty) has arrived.

/End rant

CC


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